by user Roblefko
1. Lynn Westmoreland - "I can't name them"
Westmoreland, a representative from Georgia co-sponsored a bill to place the Ten Commandments in the House of Representatives and the Senate. He appeared on The Colbert Report, where, after bantering Westmoreland for a couple minutes, Stephen Colbert says, "What are the Ten Commandments?"
Stephen Colbert: What are the Ten Commandments?
Lynn Westmoreland: What are all of them?
LW: You want me to name them all?
LW: Ummmm. Don't murder. Don't lie. Don't steal. Ummmmm.
LW: I can't name them all.
2. Ted Stevens - "Series of Tubes"
Ted Stevens, a Senator from Alaska was criticizing a proposed amendment to a bill which would have prohibited Internet service providers from charging fees to give some companies higher priority access to their networks or their customers. Here is his amazing primer on how the internet works:
- "Ten movies streaming across that, that Internet, and what happens to your own personal Internet? I just the other day got... an Internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday, I got it yesterday. Why? Because it got tangled up with all these things going on the Internet commercially. [...] They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the Internet. And again, the Internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes. And if you don't understand those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material."
3. George Allen - "Macaca"
George Allen, former Senator from Virginia, twice called S.R. Sidarth, a 20-year-old Webb campaign volunteer, Macaca. Sidarth is Indian American, but was born and raised in Fairfax County, Virginia. As a "tracker" for the opposing Webb campaign, Sidarth was filming an Allen campaign stop in Breaks, Virginia, near the Kentucky border.
During a speech, Allen paused, then began referring to Sidarth:
- This fellow here over here with the yellow shirt, Macaca, or whatever his name is. He's with my opponent. He's following us around everywhere. And it's just great. We're going to places all over Virginia, and he's having it on film and it's great to have you here and you show it to your opponent because he's never been there and probably will never come. [...] Let's give a welcome to Macaca, here. Welcome to America and the real world of Virginia.
According to Sidarth, he was the only person of color present among the crowd of 100 or so Republican supporters, some of whom applauded Allen's remarks.
4. Joe Biden - A Racially Intolerate Two-fer
- "I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy, ... I mean, that's a storybook, man."
- "I've had a great relationship. In Delaware, the largest growth in population is Indian Americans - moving from India. You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I'm not joking."
5. John Kerry - "Stuck in Iraq"
Kerry, former Presidential candidate and currently a senator from Massachusetts, was a headline speaker at a campaign rally being held for Democratic California gubernatorial candidate Phil Angelides at Pasadena City College in Pasadena, California. Speaking to an audience composed mainly of college students, Kerry said,
- "You know, education, if you make the most of it, you study hard, you do your homework and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. If you don't, you get stuck in Iraq."